ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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