He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
