4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
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