Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize
