No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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