are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
