Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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