ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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