I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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