check it out our google latitudes are spooning
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
that may or may not have been my penis.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
