yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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