Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
