he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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