her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
