like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
i would one night stand the shit outta him
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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