Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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