And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
You ever have a fart follow you around?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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