He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I love having hate sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize