No awkward lesbian experiences without me
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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