oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
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