I'm gonna have a badass scar
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
