As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
