You were right. It hurts to walk today.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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