:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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