fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
