He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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