How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
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