Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
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