Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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