the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
My vagina is officially offended.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Randomize
