he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
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We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
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We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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