im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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