She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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