Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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