I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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