well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize