Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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