So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
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