In the future we'll all be gay
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I forgot wine drunk hurts
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