Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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