That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
