Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
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I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
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Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up