My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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