I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
