If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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