Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize