Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
