I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
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