He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
How's work?
Spinning.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
soo... how was my night?
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