Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.