I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
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