found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize