I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Randomize
